There’s so much going on right now that is impossible for us to comprehend.
Movements are taking place around us – but on planes we can’t readily access (and we’re not talking airplanes although I sure wish I could hop on one to see my friends.) Transitions, opportunities, alignments… but it’s outside our reach. Yet we long so desperately to understand!
How can we surrender to the mystery?
Here’s the deal: We can’t truly “get” what’s happening around us because the web of creation is so vast, so much more complex, so much more intricate than we could ever begin to grasp!
That’s hard for us, in our human state, to accept. (It kinda reminds me of when I was a little kid sitting at the adults’ table and the conversation went right over my head). We want to take part, to listen and to be heard… but we can’t exactly follow the train of thought! So we’re left grabbing little bits and pieces and getting frustrated because it doesn’t all fit together in a nice pretty package we can put in our pocket.
We want answers to our questions. We want to know why our friends are suffering, and why our loved ones had to pass, and why things feel so hard and painful.
It’s so difficult because we’re affected by what’s going on… but we can’t truly see what’s happening or the “why” behind it. Even if someone explained it to us, we couldn’t understand! The web of creation is all around us, and Spirit is in every aspect of life — what we see, and what we don’t see. And the most important work is being done in dimensions beyond us.
When my darling Blue Bear Doug passed earlier this year from cancer, it wasn’t a surprise. He’d been ill for some time. Yet a big part of me still cried out with the unfairness of it all. Even after all the years of study and practice and all the work I’ve done, the grief was sometimes overwhelming (and truth be told still is). Why did we have to lose him? Why did I have to lose him? Why did he have to suffer? What’s the point?
But what I’d remind myself in those times of grief is that we can’t think our way into understanding everything that’s happening, from the challenges to the upheavals to the struggles and sacrifices and pain so many are experiencing this year. We simply cannot understand with our minds. But here’s the crazy thing: If we stop trying to get it all to “make sense,” we can start to “know” by feeling, rather than thinking, our way into it with our heart and soul. In my heart, I “know” everything — even losses and grief and sacrifices — are part of the beautiful, loving whole. And my job is to continue to take the next right steps and do my part to make the world a better place.
Our brains want easy answers. Our brains want 2+2 = 4. Our brains want certainty and predictability. Well, I hate to tell you, but that’s not what any of us are getting in 2020! Honestly, what we’re getting is so much better than certainty, because when we’re open to it, we’re getting glimpses of the unseen world, the world that is watching us and supporting us and loving us as Spirit weaves together a beautiful and yes, mysterious, tapestry.
I’m not saying that what you’re going through is easy — I know it’s not! I know that you may wake up each day just wondering how you will get through the next 24 hours in one piece. I understand that. I’ve been to the dark places where I was just watching the second hand move slowly around the clock and counting my breaths, trying to hold it together. From addiction to being gang raped to losing everything… I’ve been there. It’s not pretty. It’s not fun. And if someone told me while I was in the middle of it that it was all “for the greater good” I probably would have kicked them in a place they’d remember for a long time.
Easy answers don’t help when you’re in pain, grieving, or struggling. Here’s what did help me when I was in those places.
First, I didn’t let my suffering be my identity. This was hard! I had to go through all the emotions, and then I had to make a commitment to something — God, Goddess, Higher Power, Spirit, whatever — greater than myself that was my partner. I wasn’t alone. And my past was not my future. I could choose what kind of reality I wanted to create.
I also had to learn to trust. This was not easy at all. I’ve been fiercely independent, a loner, for most of my life. For many years I pushed people away because they couldn’t leave me if I left them first (great logic, right??). But over time, I learned to trust in myself, and to trust in Spirit. I had to learn to receive from others and from the Universe. When I trusted others, I created connections between me and the rest of the web of creation that had always been surrounding and supporting me, but that I had been refusing to acknowledge.
Once I realized how connected we all are, I then was moved to help others wherever I could. Even when I was doing readings for 20 bucks an hour and didn’t know if my rent would get paid, I looked for ways to help others who were less fortunate — because someone always has it worse. Always. And when you help them by sharing of yourself, not only are you raising their energy, you’re raising yours as well. It gives you perspective and awakens us to the inequities in the world.
Finally, I worked hard to stay in alignment. This is a constant practice. I want to stay present to what I’m creating and make sure that what I’m putting out is in alignment with my highest good. Each of us is always contributing to the whole, and it’s up to us to determine what that contribution looks like, whether it’s raising the collective vibration or lowering it. Even when we’re in the dark places, we can still remain in alignment by refusing to add to the suffering of others. Seriously, there have been many days where the best I could do was to NOT retaliate to someone else’s jackass-ness and bite my tongue, say a prayer, and walk away! And you know what? That’s okay. If you are simply not creating suffering for others, that can be a win — especially when you feel like they really, really deserve it!
When you stay in alignment, when you see the connection between us all, when you trust and learn to receive and start choosing to tell yourself a new story, you can’t help but start to be more and more grateful. Gratitude is the key. It makes us humble. It puts us in a peaceful, joyful state. It makes us want to reach out and share with others. And that’s what it is all about.
I believe that it only takes a small percentage of us making these kinds of intentional shifts to create an entirely new world, one that is more just, more loving, more kind, more abundant — for all of us.
We are in this together. I love you with an infinite, magical love
